When I was young, I had many friends whose parents doled out lots of rules. Consequently, those friends were always, it seemed, trying to find ways to get around those rules or to break them outright.

When I became a parent, my wife and I decided to go a different route and limit rules. Essentially, we opted to teach behavior through example rather than driving compliance with mandates. 

Fortunately, it worked. We rarely had to lay out rules. Instead of telling the kids to be home by a certain time, we would say, “be home at a reasonable time.” Result? Usually they were home by 11 or 12, not 1 or 2. Why? Because that’s the typical timeframe when we got home after a night out. 

This is the power of example. 

If your workplace is littered with rules and policies, it’s a sign. And that sign is that your managers are not setting the standard. Rules send a message. “Do as we say, not as we do.” That’s management, not leadership, and it’s rarely effective.

If you want your employees to show up on time, your leaders need to show up on time.

If you want your employees to be helpful, your leaders need to be helpful.

If you want your employees to park at the back of the lot so customers get the best spots, your leaders need to park at the back of the lot, too.

You get from people what you lead, not what you manage. Rules and policies are never as effective as good examples.

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